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Real Men Don’t Go to Church…or Do They?

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Real men don’t do church.

This sentiment seems to resonate throughout the hearts of men throughout time. History shows that women have always been the main attendees when it comes to the Christian faith. Why is that? Why do men not want to come?

First, you have to realize that men do come. If you’re reading this, and you are a faithful man of God, then way to go! You will know firsthand some of the things I’m talking about.

So, regarding the men that don’t come…why not? All I can do is tell you things that have gone through my mind or I’ve heard from others. Maybe this clicks with you too. If you know a man on the fence about coming to Jesus, please share this with him.

Church is Boring
Ok. Maybe it is. Or maybe you think it is. I’ve been a part of churches that were boring, but mostly it was because I wasn’t involved or even engaged in the service. Get involved. Participate in the work of the church – not just on Sunday mornings. Watch how your perception changes as you take part in what is going on there.

I’d rather be fishing
Me too. I worship God when I’m fishing, but I also need time when I’m encouraged by my brothers and sisters in Christ. They are my family. They encourage me to stay connected to God. They pray for me and rejoice with me. This family bond is very real. I can’t neglect them for fishing any more than a dad can neglect his wife and kids for the same reason.

Churches are full of hypocrites.
Yep. They sure are. Well, kind of. Hear me out.
If I claim to be perfect and yet live a sinful life then I am a hypocrite. If I go to church and claim to be a Christian yet never tell anyone about my supposed faith then I’m a hypocrite. Yes, there are people like that in the church. Guess what. They’re human. I understand that. They’re forgiven just like I am and you can be.
There are also people like me. I’m a sinner. Don’t expect me to be perfect. I try daily, but my effort to do good pales in comparison to the grace and forgiveness I need to be righteous before God. So, does that make me a hypocrite? If I claim to be a person who is going to mess up even though I’m trying not to, then I’ve taken away your ability to call me a hypocrite. I’m not shy about my need for Jesus to make me whole.

Church is for sissy men
Churches are full of men who sing sappy love songs to a god they’ve never seen. They pray in ways that show their vulnerability. They don’t seem like the strong, manly type of men you want to be like – some even wear pastel colors!
This is probably the most important thing in this article
Church is NOT for sissies. It doesn’t take any effort to lose control and fly off the handle. It takes no self control to give in to any of the myriads of sins that will cripple your life. In fact, by its definition, it takes no effort to be selfish at all.
It takes a TON of strength to have self control. It takes courage to reveal your heart in prayer. It takes gratitude to praise God in song. It takes strength and a willing heart to stand before others and bear witness to what God is doing or has done through you. A fearful man cannot walk in the way of Jesus for he has called us to be willing to die for him. It is not a weak man who loves his wife and children and even his church family. It is no weak man who leads his family in following Christ. It is not weakness to do right.
These things are super hard, and all of us will fail at these some of the time. If you’re looking for the easy way through life, then don’t come to Jesus. Don’t give your life to Jesus. He will wreck you. Then He will show you just how great He has made you to be.

Church is not for weaklings. It is not for sissies. It is for the strong. It is for the dedicated. It is for the selfless people willing to lay down their lives for others. Which of these things are not manly?

Why do men not come to Jesus? I think it’s because they don’t realize the awesome adventure that a life following Him truly is.

Why do you think men don’t come to Jesus? How is being a follower of Jesus very manly? Let me know what you think!


Doing church

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When you’re lying around thinking about things, what do you think about? What captures those valuable moments of meditation as you allow your mind to wander? When you get up, what do you do? What things are necessary that dictate your actions? As you do those things what is your attitude? Do you enjoy the life you are living, the things you think about and what you do?

Many of us have hobbies. Those are usually things that we love to do, and when we aren’t doing those things we are thinking about those things. When we are given the opportunity to be immersed into our hobby for a while we jump at the chance.

Many of us love sports. We have our favorite teams. We don’t miss a game. We wear the paraphernalia. If we get a chance to actually go to the game we jump at the chance and tell just about everyone we can because we are so excited.

Many of us have families. We cater to our children’s needs. We serve them to the point of fatigue and then some. We spend time together playing and working. We teach them. We are engaged in our families. When we aren’t with them we are thinking about them. When we are away we can’t wait to be back with our family.

What if we treated our hobbies, favorite teams, or families like we treat our commitment to the Kingdom of God?

What if we only saw our family on Sunday mornings for two hours? What if the family needed our help, but we were always too busy to help or figured someone else would come to their aid? What if when we were with our family we were constantly thinking about all the other things we would rather do away from our family?

How much of a fan would you be if you didn’t spend time getting to know your team? How skilled would you be at your hobby if you only went to lectures and heard about how to do your hobby but never actually got busy doing your hobby?

This is how many people “do church”. We come on Sunday mornings. Many people don’t even come for class even though it’s only an hour sooner. We sing a few songs we don’t even realize the words to. Then we listen to a sermon while thinking about what is for lunch. When we are done we shake the mandatory hands and say “hi” to others, but we are really glad to be done with this portion of our week.

We are called to so much more in our walk with Jesus.

Romans 12:1
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God–this is your spiritual act of worship.

In many churches there is a core group that understand the need to work together as a family to help spread the message of the good news of Jesus. The majority of the church is only engaged on Sunday mornings.

If we are really honest, the majority of our Christianity consists of what we do and who we are Monday through Saturday.

If your church needs you, don’t wait for someone else to get involved. We are all called to be active in working to he’ll the kingdom of God grow. Your church does need you.

You have been given the Great Commission in Matthew 28:18-20. Jesus needs you to. Offer everything to Him all the time. Let Him give you rest, but you only need rest after you’ve exhausted yourself by working. Let’s get to work.


Why Do We Do Good?

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“I don’t do good works to be saved; I do good works BECAUSE I am saved.”

Have you ever heard that phrase? Chances are that someone has said this either to you or in relation to some church they feel are teaching a works-salvation theology. I’ve heard this more times than I can count used to explain the relationship between works and salvation.

I’m not so sure this cliché really gets to the heart of this matter.

First of all, Ephesians 2:8-9 says, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith –and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God–not by works, so that no one can boast.” This passage definitely rules out the works as being part of our salvation, or does it?

What is faith? Hebrews 11:1 gives the most popular definition, but for me it’s still a little vague. When you study faith in the scripture it is more than belief. Belief is a thought or emotional connection about something. It is a conviction, but until it has an action tied to it, it is not faith. Faith is being so sure of you what you cannot see that you act on what you cannot see. Faith by its very nature is active. According to James, faith without deeds is dead. Is this a contradiction? No.

When I come to faith in God and give my life to Him I have to make some pretty major life changes. Anyone whose life has not been changed since coming to Christ has not truly been “converted” to anything and their salvation is suspect for Christ is ever working in us through His Spirit to make us more like Him. In order to have faith I must begin to act on the knowledge that God is real and I truly have been saved from my sins. The natural outcome of this is love for God. And love is always an action when it comes to God and others (love of ice cream is action too but altogether different).

When I begin to see the scope of love from God to me, then I am faced with just how unworthy of that love I really am. It is only when I come to that reality that I begin to love others as I have been loved. To love God is to love those whom God loves.

This brings me to my second thought regarding the cliché above. every time I have heard this phrase it has been in a setting where someone (at times me) has been trying to explain to someone else that they have an obligation out of their salvation to do good works to others. Even though I have always felt this to be extremely shallow I have been caught up into teaching this technique as well. There is a hint of truth here, but it misses the beauty of salvation and doing good by a long shot.

If you told me it was your birthday then ordered me to give you a gift, then it wouldn’t feel much like a gift when you received it. Or if I gave a gift to my daughter and told her, “well, your mother said I have to give this to you – it’s my obligation as your dad.” What would her reaction be? I am afraid it would be the worst gift ever for it wasn’t given out of love.

We are definitely called, as Christians who have been saved by the death and resurrection of Jesus, to do good works. Those good works are evidences of our faith. But if I am doing them out of a sense of duty, then they aren’t benefiting me or anyone else.

I don’t do good works because of an obligation due to my salvation. I do good works because God has loved me beyond my worth and comprehension. As I see His love and begin to realize that love, then I love Him back (the first and greatest commandment according to Jesus). Then, as that relationship of love grows I learn to see others through God’s eyes and love them as well (the second greatest commandment).

I don’t do good works to be saved. I do good works because God loves me, and I love Him, and I love others as well.

If you can’t accurately make that confession about yourself, then you are going through the motions. Over and over the bible condemns such actions. God would rather you be silent than lie to him in song. He would rather you keep your money than give it in frustration out of a sense of duty. But most of all, he would rather not have to worry about any of that because you are absolutely in love with Him and His creation.

I hope that the next time you hear this phrase it will spur you to remember this article. I hope you are passionately pursuing relationship with God. I hope you are loving people out of compulsion rather than out of duty – you can’t help love them because of the love-relationship between you and God.

If you haven’t begun your love-relationship with God where He has taken away your sins and given you His perfection, then I’d love to discuss any questions you may have regarding making that happen. It’s up to you. Last Friday 12 people unexpectedly died. We aren’t guaranteed tomorrow. Don’t put off your relationship with God through Jesus another day.

If you have been going through the motions, then Jesus is calling you to come back to your first Love. The most wonderful thing about Jesus is that He has never left you; He has been there the whole time waiting for you to desire Him again. If I can pray with you or help you come back in any way please let me know.

You can reach me at jddobbs@verizon.net or at the office at 245-1611. You can even comment on this article or any previous articles at http://www.mrdobbs.org.

God bless you as you do good in His name and for His sake.


Songbirds Sing, Storms Rage, and We Are Silent

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First of all this week I’d like to say to everyone who is reading my articles either in the Matagorda Advocate or on my blog at http://www.mrdobbs.org, Thank You! I really appreciate your willingness to ponder these posts. Please shoot me a message from time to time letting me know what you think. I love feedback of all kinds. That being said, on to my article:

Let’s take a trip through a day. It could be any day, but you are in it.

As you open your eyes you see the glint of sunlight through the curtains. You squint because it seems entirely too early to be awake, but hey it’s time to get up. The morning is cool, and as you let your dog outside to do its business you feel the gentle breeze across your face. The air is cool and inviting.

Overhead you hear the sounds of several birds singing their melodies. What are they singing? Who knows, but it is beautiful.

After a quick bite and a much needed wake-me-up shower you dash off to work. Person after person connects with you as deadlines must be met and customers must be satisfied.

On your way home at the end of the day you are exhausted. The windows are down, and you have the music up in the car. Ah, your favorite song on the radio – just what you needed to unwind.

After dinner it’s time to relax on the back patio where you sip evening coffee under a blanket of stars. As you look up you can just make out the milky way, then a shooting star just catches your eye. You can hear the jet overhead but you can’t see it, and in the distance a storm is brewing. The flashes of lightning and the rumble of thunder just barely make it to where you are sitting.

As you lay your head down for the night, you drift off to the sound of raindrops tapping out a rhythm on your window. Rainy evenings are your favorite times to sleep.

While this all seems very utopian, we get some parts of this in every day. Maybe you did feel the gentle breeze this morning. Maybe the sunlight is what woke you from your slumber. Maybe it rained. Maybe you got to enjoy the stars.

The question isn’t whether or not these things happen. What matters is whether or not you noticed them.

For most of us the days are not serene. We struggle through days of chaos with children and frustrating coworkers and school and work and deadlines and stress and more stress. We barely have time to taste our food. We are on the go busy, busy, busy.

No wonder God seems so distant. Maybe this is exactly what Satan wants for us.

As society becomes busier it becomes less spiritual.

When I’m busy and focused on the million things I have to worry about, then it’s easy to look over the song of the bird that was sent by God to sing His praises for me to enjoy. God did that for me, but I was too busy to notice.

When my kids and coworkers are all screaming at me then I can’t hear the sounds of the rain or enjoy the breeze on my face. I don’t even see the beauty and majesty of God’s handiwork in those other people when I’m consumed with what needs to get done or what others think about me.

For so many people the language of the presence of God is absent. We don’t talk about how the God of the Universe was trying to get our attention today. We don’t discuss things like possible lyrics to the songbird’s melody or the attributes of God declared by the storm’s intensity. We talk about the here and now that is tangible. We are distracted, and it is pretty obvious.

People, the presence of God is all around us. We cannot escape it, yet we live as if God doesn’t exist and we are the true gods of this world.

Everything in creation declares the praise of God. Even the individual atoms and molecules are bouncing around in their dance to the Creator’s praise. Our bodies at the molecular level declare the glory of the One True God, but how often do our bodies on the macro level do the same?

I recently watched a video where Louie Giglio had some fun with sounds from pulsars and whale songs. He created a mashup that allowed his congregants to sing along with parts of creation. His intent was to show that our chorus of praise is only a small part of a grander orchestra of worship being exhibited across the universe continually.

Yet we, the humble humans, are called God’s Masterpiece.

I have seen things that took my breath away. I have heard things that convulsed me to tears of joy and worship. Yet God says I am more awesome than those things.

In the commotion of the universe as it sings it’s praise to the Creator, He leans out over the edge of heaven and strains an ear for your worship. He longs to hear your melody. He put it in you; you just have to be willing to let it out.

Once you begin to live in the presence of God – where everything points you back to Him and His majesty, then you will understand better the purpose of your own worship. You have been called to join in the chorus of the universe, and you sing God’s favorite part.

May you sing with all your heart and every fiber of your being. May your worship inspire others to do the same, and may you see the presence of God in everything, for He is desperately trying to woo you to Him. Don’t believe me? Take one long look at the cross.

As always, if there is anything I can do for you please feel free to contact me at jddobbs@verizon.net or at the office at 245-1611. God bless your week!


Who’s The Real Youth Minister Here?

Today, I’d like to tell you a little bit about me.

I grew up attending non-instrumental churches of Christ.  My Great Grandfather was a song leader.  My Grandfather was a song leader.  My mother would have been a song leader, but she grew up in the 60’s and 70’s, and she was the wrong gender for that at the time.

I have been involved with the churches of Christ since before i was born.

Growing up, my parents were very involved in the local congregation, and when I’d visit my grandpa, he’d have me up on stage leading singing with him.  When I got into 3rd grade we moved to West Monroe, Louisiana where I lived until I graduated High School.  We attended the same church from that point on, and my parents were very involved.  There was hardly an event that we weren’t a part of.  I used to joke about being in the building every time the doors were open.

When I got into the youth group, they kept being involved.  They helped plan and volunteer for various activities.  They did more than encourage me to be involved.  I loved being a part of my youth group growing up.  But, you know why I was excited about youth group?  It wasn’t because I had a great youth minister (which I did). It was because from birth it was instilled into me that church was a central part of our life  My primary youth ministers were my parents.

Looking back on that now, I see how valuable they were in forming me into the man of God I am today.  I cannot thank them enough for investing into God and His church so that I would one day follow in their footsteps.

Now, I’m a youth minister.  My sister sings on the worship team for the church we grew up in, and my brother is actively involved in several outreach ministries.  I’d say they were a success.

“How does that relate to me?” You may ask.

If you are a parent, you are the single largest influence in your child’s life.  You have the power to inspire greatness or defeat into that young person.  You have the power to mold and shape them into followers of God or selfish, entitled agnostics.  You influence them.  What you are involved in and excited about rubs off on them directly and effectively.  What you are apathetic about also influences them.

You are the youth ministers.  This is for parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles.  This is for brothers and sisters and cousins.  This is for kids.  You have the power to influence your family around you.

If you are a part of a church that has a youth minister, you have a great resource there.  But his job is only to supplement what you are doing at home.  If the kids in churches are only getting Jesus on Sunday morning and Wednesday night, then they are anorexic Christians at best. The scriptures say “Train up a child in the way he should go…” The scriptures do not say “Let someone else train up your child…”

Youth ministers are a great tool, and they are useful to help facilitate and teach the youths of today.  The trends of the churches to this point have been to create Youth Minister Centered Youth Ministries.  It’s time to change the trend back to Family-Centered Youth Ministries.

May you be the Spiritual leaders in your home.  May you lead your children by example.  And may these children grow to be pillars of the Church for generations to come.

If there’s anything I can do for you or pray with you about, please feel free to contact me at my office at 245-1611 or via email at jddobbs@verizon.net.  God bless you all as you regain your role as the real Youth Ministers.


Hands-on required

This last week, I had the privilege of going to Oklahoma Christian University in Edmond, OK with the youth group from Nichols St. church of Christ for Camp Genesis.  The focus of this camp, as with many church camps, is to help the students experience God in ways they never have before.  The hope is that these experiences with God will change the lives of the teens attending.

Camp Genesis is a little different than most camps I’ve been to, however.  It’s focus is helping the kids get beyond their comfort zone and interact with other people who may be uncomfortable for these teens to be around.  The campers got to split up during the week and travel to many different ministries around Oklahoma City and serve in any way they could.  They went to an inner-city church, the Salvation Army, the City Rescue Mission, Special Care (a home for children with disabilities), the regional Food Bank, the Boys and Girls Club and various other services around the area.

All of the kids attending were very excited to have the opportunity to serve.  In fact, we got rained out on Monday and had to postpone the service projects that day, and the teens were voicing their disappointment because they just couldn’t wait to help serve.  I really enjoy that aspect of teenagers today…they will serve, and they want to serve.

As I worked and taught and laughed and sweated alongside these teens last week, I realized something I would like to share with you today.  It came to me that I really like to sing.  I love singing on Sunday morning.  I sing in my car.  I sing with the teens.  I have even performed from time to time.  I love to sing.

One of my favorite things about being a Christian is that I get to worship with other Christians every Sunday morning and any other time the Christians are meeting together.  This brings me great joy.  I know that many of you reading this feel the same joy as you worship God each week.  This is not a new concept to me, but what comes next is something I haven’t processed before:

It is really easy for us to get so caught up in worshiping with our lips that we forget what true worship is really about.

Romans 12:1-2 says this:  Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. (NIV)

This phrase “spiritual act of worship” is translated in other versions as “reasonable service of worship”.  The idea here is that the only logical, reasonable way to worship is to offer ourselves as living sacrifices…to God.

We all worship something.  What we dedicate our lives to is what we worship – sometimes it may be our job or our hobby or our family or even our addiction.  What consumes us is what we worship.

Even more so…is it worship if we are only doing it on Sunday morning with our lips?  What about the rest of our bodies the rest of the week?  Worship is about so much more than simply singing to God.  It’s easy to sing the right words at the right time.  It’s much harder to get dirty for Jesus as we serve Him by serving others.

This is what these kids were doing all week at camp.  They were giving their lives to God in service to those whom God loves.

So what do you worship?  And how do you do it?  If you are a Sunday only type of Christian, then maybe it is time to re-evaluate what you are worshiping.  Worship should be from everything you are and have every day of the week.  Christian should be who you are…not merely what you do.  Only when we get a firm grasp on this concept will the world be changed for the good in the name of Christ.

Then, you will understand God’s will for you.

I thank God for the work that these teens have done this week!  And I thank God that’s He’s working in your heart as you have read this article.  If there is any way we can serve you or help you get plugged in to serving others, feel free to contact me at jddobbs@verizon.net or on twitter @mrjdobbs.  God bless you, and may He change you daily to be more like Jesus.


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